I like licking people
My Mom Might Be The Funniest Person Ever
Mom: Is this your water or my water? Me: Mine. Mom: …I put my hand in it…. llolololololol you should have seen her shocked guilty cute face when she told me. She’s so freaking funny, this makes me laugh so hard.
It’s taken me a long time to understand why people care so much about their shoes (I still don’t really). Indian people pick a shoe that mostly matches (I mean we’re not animals, come on), go to someone’s house, take our shoes off, and no one ever knows or cares about what you wore. Even when you go out, shoes are just a functional part that shouldn’t distract from...
A word I learned today, and I kind of like it specious: Superficially plausible, but actually wrong: “a specious argument”. Misleading in appearance, esp. misleadingly attractive: “a specious appearance of novelty”.
I asked my dad yesterday where he would want to live if he could live anywhere in the world, and money wasn’t an issue. You know what he said? He would stay right where he is, in New Jersey. Maybe move to Manhattan and live the New York lavish life. Isn’t that kind of amazing though? He’s actually very content.
I used to finish my homework extra fast when it was raining outside so that I could spend more time lying in bed, listening to the rain.
I know an alien with brown eyes.
frankocean: A red heart that skips beats. A grey mind that never slept and never fell for love..or simply won’t admit the slip. Scars cover it’s soft skin but don’t callous the flesh, that flesh that has touched but never held. That spirit of an immortal wouldn’t die.. even in the crash. That alien with brown eyes that never wept, made an alien of me.
If you let me, here’s what I’ll do: I’ll take care of you.
Women Aren't Crazy →
Gaslighting is a term often used by mental health professionals to describe manipulative behavior used to confuse people into thinking their reactions are so far off base that they’re crazy.
My mind is a monster, it consumes everything
naturallydope: True Affection | The Blow I...
I think I have an excellent sense of humor
Naked paper writing is the only paper writing I like to partake in.
I sat thinking how terribly sad it was that people are made in such a way that...– The Solitaire Mystery, Jostein Gaarder
For the past couple of weeks I’ve been able to hear the people who live above me having sex. And by that I mean it sounds like this chick has multiple mindblowing orgasms or she’s just very vocal, either way whatever good for her. Anyway, it’s always in the morning, EARLY morning too, like 6 a.m. My mom visited me this weekend, and woke up to the sound of this...